I have been in such a crappy mood. What the hell is wrong with me?? It seems like I have a permanent case of PMS lately. Grrr. I open my mouth and the things that come out of it shock even me!! I have analyzed myself and think I may be putting up the walls to protect myself from the fact that DH is leaving in 6 days and that if I push him away I will miss him less. Does that make sense? Anyway I know I have been a royal bitch and I am making a conscious effort to be nicer . I am sure hubby and kids will appreciate that. ;-)
So... thanks for the comments on my previous entry. If you knew what a private person I usually am you would appreciate it even more!! Actually writing about it did nothing but stir up old demons and so I think I won't be doing that any more. I will just add that no we did not prosecute him. Basically because my parents didn't want to drag me through the papers etc BUT my dad beat the living shit out of him and he was ousted in the community and I saved the little girls next door to him by exposing him. I don't necessarily agree with how my parents dealt with it but they did what they thought was right and he is dead now anyway so no point dwelling on it. I saw him one time as an adult and I spat in his face. So that is that.
The weather here in Florida is about picture perfect at the moment. We have clear blue skies, sunshine and a breeze. It is getting warmer everyday though and we are in desperate need of some rain. So all you Brits send us some rain and we will reciprocate with a bit of sunshine...deal?? ;-)
The relatives pissed me off. hmm.. what a shocker huh?? ;-) My daughter offered to drive them to Valdosta to an amusement park that has free admission to their water park as well. It's closer than Disney and cheaper. We made all the arrangements including me getting up early to go on base and buy the tickets..they are a lot cheaper there..so as I am walking out the door yesterday to drive to the base the phone rings and they have changed their minds..they are soooo lucky I hadn't already got the tickets or they would have been dead meat. ;-)
Well I have rambled on enough for now. I hope everyone has a wonderful Saturday and a great weekend. I have a graduation party to go to today for one of our very good friends daughters. It should be fun. Albeit hot. ;-)
11 comments:
Alot can be said for councilling Lyn but quite often, revisiting an unpleasant memory ,can do more harm than good ,well that has been my experiance any way ,Let sleeping dogs lie I say ,and yes I agree you probably are building a barrier to protect your self ,you must make an effort to be nice ,Dont let him take a memory away with him of a cross patch LOL.........Jan xx
I'm sorry you had to go through all of that horribleness! I am glad that you told your parents and that they believed you and sort of did something. He sounded very manipulative. I fear for my girls something fierce. I keep very good watch of them.
Sorry the relatives are being so ugly.
Traci
Sounds like a good deal to me....it's like winter over here again, so feel free to take as much rain as you like!! I'm back on the Dairy Milk to try and cheer myself up, it's that bad! Hope you have a great weekend - enjoy the party!
Hugs,
I would send you some rain but even though it`s cold and miserable here, we haven`t actually had ENOUGH rain to avert a drought! Please, please send some of your gorgeous Florida sunshine to us in the UK, we are badly in need of some Summer! :o)
Sandra xxxxx
Hi hon!! Hope you are staying cool somehow in this heat. Another friend of ours has a graduation party too today. We are so new in FL with few friends really other than work so far... so no grad parties this year. Yes, I too have some days where my mouth could use a little horse's bridle on it. I keep trying to do better then and ask the Lord to help me. It is hard sometimes. My ex can make me turn into a gutter in just a few moments though to this day. Don't know why but guess it's why we aren't together anymore. Just too different. Hugs,
Lisa
http://journals.aol.com/randlprysock/AdventuresFromFlorida/
Perhaps my sweet friend, your mood stems from writing your truths here. It is ALWAYS a good thing to do and I'm proud of you. I'm also glad to know you told someone and that they dealt with the asshole. As for the big guy leaving, you've been here before and know how difficult and sad it is so of course you are trying to protect yourself. It will be alright honey. Even if it doesn't feel like it for awhile. Remember I love you. MWAH! Traci
When i first opened up in my journal i vomited and sat and shook over what i had written and got very paranoid and i didnt talk to my family for a day or two. Then i wrote again, and it got easier. Everyone feels differently. I need to write more but i tone it down and censor myself, which is worse. Life is so confusing!
I have been thinking about you alot and i am so sorry DH is leaving. Pushing others away is a natural thing.
I hope you are having a good weekend.
HUGS AND LOVE,lisa
I think your Dad did what any father would have done.And glad you spat on him as well,he deserved that and more.
I think you are a bit annoyed hubby is going for so long . . you will be ok,it will soon pass. Relatives can drive you nuts too,maybe thats part of something too.Let us know how you cope wont you?
Hi Lyn, you visited my journal and I ventured over here! I get like you when Chad gets ready to deploy. I constantly snap at him, pick fights, etc. I remember our first OIF deployment they kept talking about how normal it was to do this, that it's a defence mechanism...but the guilt is still there, at least it's always been for me. Chad left this past October and I remember the NIGHT he was leaving, standing in the kitchen starting a fight with him...we had HOURS left and what am I doing, kissing him, cuddling with him, no....yelling at him about the dirty dishes that he said he'd do and hadn't done. Of course he went and did it and NEVER held it against me. God bless these men who accept their wives who at times lose their minds a little.
God Bless
Christy http://journals.aol.com/my3gifts/ChristysThoughts/
Lyn.........you are welcome to some british weather.....we have had rain pretty much for the last week.....along with some strong winds....hey its Bank Holiday what do you expect........
sending some rain your way......sunshine please :o)
Jayne
Ok, I should've read this before saying "I don't know what happened to him" in my previous comment.
Lv Ste
xx
http://journals.aol.co.uk/stevietwain/ThelifeofSte/
Post a Comment