Happy Thanksgiving!!

Good Morning Campers!!

It's a chilly 49F here this morning!! It definitely feels like the holidays!! Love it!! Just wanted to take a moment to wish each and everyone of you that celebrates Thanksgiving a wonderful day filled with the love and warmth of family and friends ...it's just me and the "kids" today..FIL wasn't feeling up to coming round so we will go say hi to him in a little while..hubby's thanksgiving is long over as he is 15 hours ahead of us....tomorrow I shall be heading out into the madness that is Black Friday!! woo hoo!! Today marks the official start of the silly season in my house and I intend to enjoy every last minute of it!!

Here are the things that I am grateful for on this day of thanksgiving...


1. my family...we may not always be together in person but we are bonded by love...

2.. my cozy house....

3... friends....

4.... the joy of the season....

5..... candles...my house smells so good right now!!

6...... my health....

7.......my happiness..I have had some struggles with this so I am grateful that on this day I can say that I am genuinely happy... and content...

8........ this blog..it may not get updated daily like it used to but it's always here when I need it...

9......... good books...

10......... all of you reading this!!

L xx

Monday Morning...

Good Morning Campers!!

It's been a while again...I remember the days when the first thing I did every morning was log in to my journal and see what was happening in the lives of my fellow journalers...those days have long since passed and I miss them...yes I get updates on face book but it is not the same cozy community we used to have.. I am guilty of not writing very much these days either...I used to think I was writing just for myself but perhaps not??

Anyway..this morning I am writing for me..I have a lot going on in this head of mine and the best way for me to clear it out is to get my thoughts down on "paper" so to speak...journaling. "Sudafed for the soul"...;-)


...I have been going through some crap with my friend again..her life is just one big drama after another and it takes its toll on me...an example of this is that she is moving again due to financial issues and has been pondering back and forth on what to do..whether to stay with her husband..she is miserable with him but financially she can't leave him..I have been there for her every day..listened to her..advised her...supported her...not financially I will add..those days are over...but I have been there in every other way..well this past weekend I got sick..nothing major..just a little head cold/sinus thing...I did not hear from her at all except for one text....I got to thinking about it and she rarely asks how I am or if I need anything or if I'm lonely ..missing my hubby..etc etc... it is always about her and her problems..well I am going to change that...I can't change anyone except myself and I am no longer going to allow this friendship to be one sided....it is toxic and I need to let it go..I will be her friend of course but I cannot allow her problems to become mine..I cannot feel guilty because my life is blessed...I cannot help that I have a wonderful husband and he provides for us..that my children and I have a great relationship and that there is not really any drama going on... instead of feeling guilty I am going to be grateful....

Speaking of grateful this is my favourite time of the year!! Time for me to start enjoying it ....I have allowed her troubles and anxieties for the season dull my joy! no more!! I am excited!! Hubby is coming home for 8 days!!! he has another conference in San Diego and has taken a weeks leave to fly home and see us! No he won't be here for Christmas but we will get to celebrate with him his 50th birthday and we will get to see him and hug him and be together!! he arrives on the 2nd...;-)

Well I feel better already! just getting my thoughts down on "paper" always helps me..I hope everyone has a joyful week getting ready for Thanksgiving...to me it is the official start to the "crazy" season..let the festivities begin!!

L xx

Happy Birthday in heaven Mum....

Today would have been my mums 73rd birthday. No Happy Returns Mum..just happy memories..

As you know I did not have the greatest of relationships with my Mum.She was moody, miserable, bitchy a lot of the time. She was also very funny, kind hearted, great with old people..would give you the shirt off her back.. great sense of humour..we once almost got thrown off a bus for the uncontrollable giggles caused by a man sitting oppisite us with this huge bandage on his nose..one look at him and her and I were off...it was terrible!! the more we tried to stop the worse it got... LOL She cried at the Waltons and Little House on the Prarie.. she loved dogs..we had a Red Setter called Tramp for 14 years.. she walked him 3 miles every day..sometimes twice...she could do cartwheels, juggle, ride a moterbike, never learned to drive..she tried a few times but always gave up she was way too nervous.. she made Christmas very very special.. she would begin "hoarding" food as early as September..she kept it all under th stairs...she loved Malteasers (english candy similar to whoppers) she smoked..in her later years rolled her own to save money.. I saw her get into at least 3 fist fights with women...she had a terrible temper...one time this girl was after me..said I had been after her boyfirend..my Mum drug her out the pub by her hair and told her she ever so much as looked at me wrong she would be back... ;-) She loved Country and Western music and dancing and slot machines. she was the life and soul of the party and no one would ever believe the way she was at home..she was terrified of Doctors, hospitals and had a morbid fear of choking.. she chewed her food into tiny pieces to avoid that....if we ever got hurt as kids she would go get the neighbours because she would panic......she once knocked two ornaments together while dusting and smashed them and cut her palms badly..she had to have stitches and they pretty much had to put her to sleep to do them..LOL...she was always dusting, hoovering, would come in on a saturday morning when I was trying to sleep in and open the curtains and the bloody windows and start hoovering around me...LOL.. she would spit on a hanky and wipe off my face as a kid ewwwwwwwwww...she was only just 5' tall..she was one of twins..her twin died at birth..she was born in a workhouse..she only weighed 2lb.. she never met her dad he was an alcoholic and died of Cirrosis of the liver.. her family was very poor.. she had 2 sisters and 3 brothers...hr real name was Diana but veryone called her babe as she was the youngest.. I once watched her and her sister get into a fight..my dad and my uncle had to sperate them with a water hose...LOL.. she was very very passionate... she would defend us kids to the very end...looking back I can see we had far more happy times than sad...but when I reached puberty that was it..we fought on and off for years..she semed to be jealous of me..she begrudged me the relationship I had with my dad..she felt like it was us against her...the things she said and did to me were awful..she hit me..she calld me all the names under the sun...she hated with the same passion she loved...but at the end of the day I can say that she loved me and she did her best...she grew up in a time when you didn't talk about womens problems, depression was not an option, I know she suffered from it though, and I know she had a terrible time with menopause but never asked for help... and I can admit I was a typical moody teenager. I just wish things could have been different.. I wish we could have had the kind of relationaship I have with my daughter... that is the one good thing that came out of it..I was determined to not be the way she was...
Anyways...
No Happy Returns Mum...just happy memories till we meet again..night night God Bless....
Lyn