Good Morning Campers!!
I appreciate every ones support of my last post. I did finally get a chance to talk to him about it and his response was that he had a lot of built up frustration and anxiety etc about the upcoming deployment..that he was just letting off steam...I can accept that but part of me is still reeling from the venom he spewed and will always wonder if he really thinks those things about me secretly..he did apologise and at this point in the game I chose to accept his apology and move on because the alternative is to let this rift stay between us and with him moving across the world from me there is enough distance between us without adding to it...does that make sense??
The count down to him leaving is very emotional...but I am ready to move on to the next phase..to shift the focus to me again..to start making myself a priority again and setting myself some goals...this last few months has been all about him and rightly so but I am ready to get on with this and get it closer to being over with ..
The family visit was fun..the going away party a huge success...my hubby will go away knowing he is loved and will be missed and that his home and family will be well taken care of...and that was my goal...
This military life is a roller coaster of emotions that's for sure...but it's been a good life to us and I know I am blessed...sometimes the struggles are hard but they have made me what I am today..a strong secure woman...I will survive these next two years..we will achieve our ultimate goal of a secure retirement and I know one day we will look back and miss all this...
Have a wonderful weekend...
L xx
28 comments:
You are a strong secure woman and have every right to some me time. It will come and your hubby will do just fine. Military life isn't easy and the strains it puts on relationships is very hard. Choosing to move forward is for the best. There is nothing than can be done about the past. Today is what matters and all that any of us are sure of. ((( Hugs ))) to you!
Blessings to you as you transition. I understand your accepting his apology. Big hug!
Let the adventures begin....cant wait are ya looking for jobs, more pool time? shopping?? ...Big big hugs for all you & your family have gone thru protecting mine...the military is a tough life...hang in the girlie!
xoxoxo
I understand accepting the apology, good for you. You are a strong woman. Glad the party was a success. Hang in there.
You would have to be a very special woman to deal with this like you have. I admire you no end.
Love, Angie, xx
GOOD FOR YOU!
Glad you two put your differences aside and got back in the game instead of letting it all blow to hell before he leaves!
xoxoxox
Christopher
http://life-accordingtochristopher.blogspot.com/
I am so glad that you guys cleared the air. You can make it through this deployment. You can do anything. We are all here for you!
Kelli
I can't imagine what a military life is like. I think all you women are tough gals! I can't imagine not having Kevin around for months or even years at a time.
Sending you some big hugs!
You are a strong woman and you are doing the right thing for your family at this time. You forgive now... but I know you won't forget. It can be addressed again...maybe after the deployment... {{hugs}}} you are amazing Lyn.
be well....
I'm glad you're feeling better, and that you talked it out. I still am disturbed by those comments he made.
Saying something like that comes from somewhere, and it didn't just appear out of nowhere because he got irritated.
I think that he saw that part of himself in you and is projecting those insecurities at you.
Much love and respect to those in the military and the spouses that stand behind them.
Glad that things have sort of straightened themselves out.
Lyn, I couldn't imagine to marry a guy who is in a military.Not that I am. Glad things working out for you. You enjoy your weekend. >>HUGS2U<< Nancy
You certainly are a strong secure woman Lyn - and I hope your husband appreciates how very lucky he is to have you. Im sure he does. As you say this will all be worth it in 2 years time and you can both reap the rewards.
(((Hugs)) to you both
Jane
xxxx
Dear Lyn,
I have not stopped by for some time and I apologise. I, like Missie, have no idea what it must be like for you military wives. I know my hubby and I try to remember to pray not only for the soldiers that serve our countries...but for those that are left back at home to tend the home-fires.
May the Lord bless you and keep you in His tender care and mercies.
Blessings,
ALBERTA Lori
Hello Lyn,
I hope you and your husband are doing well. It sounds like it will be hard for him to be going away but when its all over I am sure you will enjoy eachother. Do make yourself a top priority and do something nice for yourself. Just focus on what's ahead for yourself and your family. We are all here for you and are cheering you on. Do take care and have a great weekend.
Glad you guys were able to clear the air Lyn. Two years is a very long time. Will he be able to come home on leave during that time? I cannot imagine. The longest time my ex was away was one year and we had two weeks in the middle of it together, such as it was. I will be praying for you as I know how difficult it is, but I do hope you are able to enjoy the "me" time you will be having. That can be pretty wonderful as well!! xxoo
Sounds like you got things figured out in a healthy way. I was a military wife once upon a time, so understand where you are coming from. I always found the going away part hard, and truthfully when he first came back home, lol. I mean I was happy he was back home, but it was hard letting go of the reigns and letting him take over as lead, when I had been going solo with the kids and all the responsibilities of family.
Hang in there Lyn, sounds like you are going to be just fine. Blessings to you!
Well deployment time has come. I am so glad you and DH talked and an apology was offered. I had no idea his deployment was going to be a 2 yr deployment. I will keep you all in my prayers that he will be safe and you will continue to stay the strong, secure and independent woman that you are.
We are here for you always,
Barb *queenb
Hi Lynn after being away from the pooter for a while,I return to find your last two postings.I was sad to learn of the rift between you and hubby.Men always say the things which they know will hurt us most....I am happy to read now you have mended the rift.Those things WILL pray on your mind.One never knows if they realy spoke the truth or not.I myself would forgive and forget,but with old Motherhen once bitten twice shy, so my answer would be to Rooster if it was said again EVER then no second forgivenesses LOL!!You will soon get used to being alone.I myself as you know are now alone YES it is hard without them around,but it can be harder too with them around all the time.Something you will also have to learn to live with in the retirement yrs.So take one day at a time.God puts us where he knows we should be.So leave it with him.Safe travels to hubby and love and hugs to yourself and family.Take Care God Bless I will pop in from time to time to read you,even though I am not blogging now.Luv Kath XXXXX
I just was thinking about you and hoping you are ok. I can't imagine having my hubby that far away for that long. Big hug!
Hi Lyn...yes it is best at this time to put all this behind you or in a secret place where you can handle it along with everyday comings and goings!!! Being retired military I know some of what you are going thru...and I remember some of what hubby went thru also...seems we both had to make some real give and take time...I hear where you are coming from...but not where hubby is coming from...nor do I know what pressure he is under...we are staying put...he is going away...is this a good thing for him?? or for us?? well the last I heard Uncle Sam really doesn't care one way or another about how we feel...just that someone has to leave...go fill a slot...!!??!!! so hang tough girl...dig in...when you have a bit of "me" time...enjoy it to the fullest..but don't forget where he is and his feelings...seems we "military wives" have to reign in ourselves from time to time...right??? doesn't seem fair...but then when has life ever been "fair"???? life is good...and we are blessed with goodness...let's do our best with it all!!!! hugs big time Lyn...from Ora in KY (and believe me I have been there done that stuff)
{{{Lyn}}} It sucks that he did this right before a deployment. I really admire how gracefully you've handled it. Your poor heart must be broken in two. I just want to give you a big hug and him a kick in the rear! (like I said, you have more grace than I!) The party sounded like a good sendoff. Good job.
Oh Lyn, I'm so glad that you both discussed it. Words can be very hurtful for a long time. And yes, I believe that people's emotions can get out of control, and things come out that they don't believe, but they want to hurt as much as they can at that time.
I know you will get through this final deployment.
Hugs!
Hi Lyn!! Sorry I have been on a journal break for so very long... I haven't been around to visit lately but I am still here and missing all my journal friends. Reading this entry I thought how blessed I am to know a kind and strong friend like you are. We all say things we don't really mean from time to time out of anger. And this is one of those stressful times. Maybe this is his way of making it easier for him to part with you temporarily... you know, like psychologically he is going to miss you so much so he said some things to make the time when he has to leave a little easier because in the back of his mind somewhere he'll be thinking well we need a break anyhow because of some arguing when really he means all the opposite things and feels the opposite things. LOL I know this makes no sense at all but teenagers do this with their mothers all the time when they are ready to fly the coop but not quite old enough to go yet. It's because they love mom a lot and they are trying to make separation possible. LOL. Anyhow I read that somewhere. We all know you two lovebirds love eachother like crazy!!!
Lisa in Kentucky
PS DId I mention I wanted to kill hubby yesterday over the way he was acting LOL? Men, humpf. The teenager too. LOL. But so glad you are moving forward and putting this behind you. I told myself today is a new day but LOL yesterday I let him have a few words. LOL.
In love of course. LOL
Lisa in Kentucky
Lynn. hope things are going well. The adjustment must be weird but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.
Lyn,
First I want to thank you for stopping by.I enjoy reading your blog.And I now have put your husbands deployment on my prayer list. And for you to ask me ,Pray to help you become a believer is really som thing, God has already began to be a part of your life more.You posted that your husband said some terrable things to you out of hurt and they came from evil. So you see you are a believer theres good and evil.Im not saying your husband is evil at all.He was acting out of fear.But your going to need to get to know God.These next two years are scary and difficult.And you dont have to carry those emotions by yourself. He will begin to put a peace in your heart,a smile on your face.Even your home will different.Ive lost three out five sisters and my parents in the last ten years.Thats one of the deepest darkest places thsat a person goes thru.Ilove my family with ll my heart. And to go over that agaon and again was torture. But thru those times I could feel Gods love holding me together and helping me breathe again. Anyways Ills top here for now. I pray safety for your husband. The Bible says the tongue is like a two edged sword it could lift someone up or tear them down,Just by what words we use.God Bless you my friend and your husband as well.
SINCERLY
JOHN IN CALIFORNIA
Love your blog :o]
ours is http://thelaffalouds.com
Cheers!
Deb & John (also a Brit)
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